I love my job!

Ahhh, a moment of repose... never knew I could enjoy a moment like this until now. I mean that I really appreciate it more than I think I ever could have. My life is different: as a mom I now meet someone's needs in a way I never have before. I love my daughter sooooo much, it's crazy. But my life is so different now. I tend to her needs - her need to be held, played with, changed, fed... and yeah it happens to take up a lot of time. That's just the way it is now. And its fine, really, but it's also a drastic change from the life I used to live, a mere month ago and before.
As a married gal, I'd spend time with my husband, do the dishes, laundry, housework, and have everything "under control" most days I thought. My house didn't tend to get too messy I don't think and Robbie helped with chores and cooking when I needed a break. That was my "job", especially over the summer when I was finshed with my teaching job for the summer. I also took the responsibility of being pregnant as a sort of "job". I tried to eat really well when I could, following recipes from "What to Eat When Your're Expecting" and looking for healthy treats at the grocery store to take the place of my normal Chocolate Chip Cookie and Ice Cream cravings (although I did often indulge... just ask Rob about McDonald's sundaes). I took my vitamins and did almost everything normally as I would around the house and outside...although I pined when my mother in law mowed the lawn and Robbie did yard work- I wanted to be out there in the sunshine, sweating my butt off too! ( believe it or not, I kind of like mowing the lawn).
But nothing I did could really prepare me for actually having the baby here, in my arms, in my life, until she was here!
I never was a baby person really, I wasn't always comfortable around infants - they're so fragile looking and scary and when they're not mine, I'm a little tentative. But something happened when Madilyn arrived. She taught me to become a baby person~ her baby person! Something just clicked when she came into the world, and I just started taking care of her without thinking too hard about it, and it worked! I'll admit, I feel so much like "I have no idea what the heck I'm doing!" so much of the time, but somehow it works. I have a lot of support - my parents, in-laws, and sisters- in law have been amaaaaazing helps to me, answering my stupid questions, offering to watch Madily so I can take a nap, and just encouraging me along (the emotional support/affirmation is huge). All that to say, man, it's a lot of work, but it's soooooooo worth it! And I'm now appreciating more than ever (to get back to my main point) a few minutes here and there to "steal away" and do something quickly for myself.
And ironically as I type here..... motherhood calls - I see my baby squirming and grunting on the baby monitor. Back to work. And I can honestly say " I LOVE my job!!!!"

Madilyn Grace Scrapbook 1

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